I have just done the usual with my chooks and alpacas and then did some pruning and tidying in the garden. I sat down to write but thought I would read a couple of the blogs I follow. I went to Mariah Hill which is as far as I got and ended up with tears streaming down my face. Earlier, when I was in the garden I placed some flowers on the grave of SerenityView April who died back on the 22nd July at only three months of age. The other flowers, placed when she was buried have well since dried out,and I pondered how one can be touched by the life of another, and that said other, does not need to be human to feel a connection. Then I sit down here in my lounge room at my laptop (with one dog at my feet and the other one trying to squash on my lap) and read the most beautiful life story of a much older alpaca, than my April. One who has brought not just financial rewards, but given the gift of love, trust and faith.
Jolimont Stefano was a quality stud animal and obviously valuable in a business sense and he has left his mark on the alpaca world with quality offspring. However, it is the sense of understanding and connection between humans and this alpaca that was most touching. There are people in this world who have not contributed to the lives of others, in the way that Stefano has. For those of you who don't know of Rainbow Bridge please read the following. I must say I do find the word 'Pet' inadequate. Alpacas can make good pets but for business owners we do not consider them as such. Then, I don't think of my dogs and cat as just 'pets'. Maybe the pet rock I have on my windowsill in the laundry is what I could class as a pet. ( I might add that pet rock has special significance, having been made and given to me by my eldest daughter, Melanie, when she was around six years old.) OK, enough here is Rainbow Bridge
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.
When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.
You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.
Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....
A couple of nights ago my husband, Kim and I watched a movie called The Bucket List. I had bought it well before Christmas after younger daughter, Krystal, had told me that she and Luke had gone to see it at the pictures. Krystal and Luke are big movie buffs and she recommended the movie. I actually find it hard to find the time to watch movies and one night was disappointed when we finally went to watch it upstairs in our bedroom and the DVD did not work properly. We have an older style TV, set top and DVD player etc in that room. As it has been hot here and the house is designed, especially upstairs, primarily to keep warm ,we used the actual main bedroom which is on the ground level. My visitors love it as they get the use of an en suite and the room has a pleasant outlook onto the back patio. It also has a nice 80cm plasma Television (helped when a family member worked at an electrical place and so got us good deals!) I was well aware that the movie was about two men, played by Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson who both got cancer which is how they met. One gets to thinking and starts a bucket list. I note that Jacki on her blog, Life in the Slow Lane, has made a bucket list and I think we should all take a leaf from her book and follow suit. Watch the movie for a start!!!
Now in this bedroom is a Queen size bed and the one we sleep in upstairs is a King. I have to say a King can be great(especially as one of our dogs sleeps on the bed) but we often seem 'miles' apart from each other. This has been the case anyway in the last year or so. So we cosied up and watched the movie. Naturally, after it was over I had to ask the deep question "So, what would be on your bucket list?" His answer went something like this:
I don't have the desire to jump out of a plane (they do in the movie )
I have had moments such as walking through and having lunch in a medieval town in France (St Paul de Vence when we finally went overseas together in 2007) (They travel in the movie)
Then he blows me away by saying " I don't need a bucket list, my life is content with you". I laughed and said yeah , right..you are joking and the reply was 'No, I am not. I am content in my life with you."
Well there is my special moment of late. I also felt guilty as I haven't been content. I loved my previous home and agreed to sell it because I got tired of him being unhappy. He had said it was my place and didn't feel he belonged there, plus as he was unhappy at work, we would not be able to afford to stay there (electricity bills and other things like you wouldn't believe) and he earnt more than me. So we find where we are now and I agree because I usually do. I throw myself into it, hook, line and sinker. Alpaca business, getting chooks, blah blah. He resigns from work (last March) and told me the day after doing so. I thought , OK. We raised our kids for a good part on much less than what I earn now so it is no big deal. He works full time at home and is an excellent handy man. He should have been a builder! It would be too hard to manage all the animals otherwise , though a part time casual job would have been good as it is getting on for a year now and the finances are not looking so good, helped along by the drought and constant need to buy feed and a daughter's wedding. Anyway ,driving into Bunnings, a favourite place of his, a job working there in the tool section etc was on the chalk board and we both saw it. I have brought it up a couple of times since and although he had said previously about considering a job at Bunnings he obviously is not ready to go back into the workforce. He has no desire to return to the computing networking field.I know he is fitter and happier here and does not have the 'social' need that I do so I would need (money considerations aside)to be working , even if on a casual basis. I am guilty of not being able to accept exactly who he is as a person, yet he accepts me as I am. Well, this is how I analyse it.
I enjoy aspects of living here and of late have really enjoyed seeing produce from the garden and exploring more about how to be self sufficient. I do cringe when I think of some of the things I did in my previous life, such as using an insinkerator instead of composting and giving to the chooks as happens now. Wasting electricity and things like gel nails. Hell, who needs gel nails when you can get fresh garden dirt for free !!! I still look after my nails to a point,(have you seen the blog with the room complete with chandelier and egg incubator?) though they just don't have length for long. I still enjoy getting dressed up, though I wear jeans so much more at home and my favourite shoes at home are 'blunnies'. Most of all I enjoy being able to read what others do, especially in being as self sufficient as possible and enjoying the fruits of one's labour in the garden. I will miss having this time when I have to go back to work so will have to make some time for blog reading and blog writing.
Oh and my bucket list..
Be grateful for what I have.
Don't live in the past, look to the future.
I have to add this..I want to go back to Paris and London! Oh and Venice. (but, at least I have been there!)
Be happy that I have tried and not to stress out when I cant change things or attitudes (this refers to work)
Live, Love, laugh!!!!!